Seriously, do it! You work hard! I don’t care if you’re a SAHM (stay-at-home-mom) or a WM (working mom) or a SAHD (stay-at-home-dad) or a WD (working dad). We all put in a lot of work because our children are the most precious part of our lives. So they deserve our dedication. When I was a WM, I remember coming home and having to muster any energy I had left from the day just to feed my daughter dinner, give her a bath, read her a story, and put her to bed. Sure my husband could have done that if he wasn’t traveling for work, but that was the only time I had with her most days. I tried to sneak some quality time in with all the “nightly business” I had to do, but it was difficult. I had a lot of guilt about the whole situation. I worked Tuesday through Saturday or Wednesday through Sunday depending on the season. Many nights I would come home and my adorable baby would have already be in bed for hours. It made me sad. I was an event planner and I felt like I was spending all my time making other people’s special moments amazing all while I couldn’t even take my sweet girl to an Easter Egg Hunt. I remember being so super sad when I had to miss our family’s annual trip to Tahoe for Labor Day. My hubby took our daughter with my family without me. He sent me a picture at work and I started crying.
When I became a SAHM I had a ton of guilt about not bringing any income into our home and I kept wondering if I was going to lose the essence of who I am as a person. I was surprised to find that I was more at peace with myself as a parent. It took a while to get there, but I did. As I settled into my new role and found inner peace with the my previous guilt, I started to have other issues. For example finding “me time” was a little tough. I mean, as a SAHM my whole day is centered around someone that needs me to do everything from wipe her butt to just keep her alive…oh I also have to entertain her, socialize her, and teach her things. I was never really alone, I couldn’t even pee for one minute without her coming into the bathroom. When I was a WM I had the drive to and from work to be by myself. At the time, I took it for granted, but as a SAHM it sounded like a vacation. Like, “What? I could listen to my own jams and stop at the grocery store without having to schlep a tiny in and out???” I realized that what I did for work doesn’t make up the kind of person I am. Sure, my focus shifted from wedding cakes and bridal couture to the best sippy cups and stroller accessories. But that didn’t mean that the person I am changed.
The grass is always greener on the other side. Now that I have two adorable kids to care for, my days are busier than ever. They have their own places to be and I get to be the one that takes them there. They have the most adorable conversations with each other and with me. I love being a SAHM, I think it’s the best job ever. But that’s my personal opinion. I admire and respect everyone’s personal feelings about what they are doing. You like being a WM? That’s awesome. You’re fabulous at it. I’m happy for you. My hubby is a WD and I think he is the bomb.com. He gives his all at work and calls throughout the day to see how we are doing. When he comes home he helps around the house, helps with the kids stuff, and plays with the kids. Just because I like being a SAHM doesn’t mean I think every parent should. In the words of Miranda Lambert, “It takes all kinds of kinds.”
Neither type of parent has it easy. Because being a parent isn’t easy. My friends and I always say, “Havin’ babies aint for punks.” Did any of us choose to have kids because we thought it would simplify our lives? Ummmm, NO! Not at all. In my book we’re all just doing our best, and that’s what makes us all good parents no matter the classification. Guess what, anyone who contemplated whether or not to try the “cry it out” method is a good parent regardless of your final decision. Anyone who took more than 10 minutes deciding on a carseat is a good parent. Because being a good parent is about putting thought into the choices you make for your child. I don’t have to use the same diapers or implement the same disciplinary tactics as you to say that you’re a good parent. Because if you’re disciplining your child, you’re a good parent. If you don’t think about the choices you make for your kids, then I hate to say it, but you may not win the highly coveted “Parent of the Year” award.
So, for all the hard work we do, let’s give ourselves a raise! We deserve it! I’ve been talking to a lot of mamas about what they do to reward themselves after a long week or a long day. Here are a few answers: a pedicure, a new top, some new jewelry, a Nordstrom’s or Bauble Bar shopping spree, a massage. Well, I just heard about this fantastic new website that makes getting those rewards even easier. At raise.com you can buy gift cards at a discounted rate! Yep, you can also sell gift cards. You know, if you got a gift card from a place that you wouldn’t buy anything from. How awesome is that? Seriously, where has this webbie been all my life??? Here are some of the places you can buy your gift cards from and the saving you can get:
H&M – 14%
Victoria’s Secret – 12.4%
Bloomingdales – 16%
Bath & Body Works – 17%
Starbucks – 19.1%
Awesome, right! They only have limited number of discounted cards from each store, so you have to just buy it when you see it. But I am totally loving this website. I just love it when my money goes further. So, let’s all give ourselves a raise!